Dope Mama

To Be Revisited in One Year

————   by J  -  November 23rd, 2017

The first blog post is always the hardest. The first post also has a tendency to get buried. Those are both reasons why I chose this for my first post here. This is a personal mission statement and while I encourage you to write your own, I’m writing this mainly for my own accountability to myself. I’m being very (uncomfortably) honest and don’t intend to promote this post across social media, etc, although I am making it public here. (I may make changes to this post as time goes on.)

It works that I’m typing this up in the very early hours of Thanksgiving Day, because I am grateful for the opportunities in my life right now and would have to be fucking stupid not to make the most of them.  Right now we are living in my late father-in-law’s house, with the opportunity to launch up📈 from this. For the first time in years, I’ve spent the past few months not worried about making rent. If you’ve ever had to worry – really worry – about making your rent or paying your power bill, you can imagine what that feels like. Instead of scrambling, Skate Dad and I are mindfully planning our next steps.

I am writing this to look back on a year from now. Year one is about staying accountable and on point and creating momentum.

Blog 🖥

I recently came to the revelation that I want to be a writer first and foremost. I quit my day job (retail at a string of video and record stores) to freelance back in 2007, mainly advertising myself as a web designer, and I never really questioned that plan again. I had blogs that made money but blogging always felt like the hobby and side-hustle… even though that was the ‘work’ I actually wanted to spend my time doing. I ended up unintentionally on hiatus while my boys were small and now that I’m back, I want to focus on my own content.  (Web design and anything else can be the side-hustle.)

A year from now, I want a page rank of at least 3.

I want at least 1000 likes on Facebook.

I want at least 2000 Twitter followers.

My goal is to post at least 24 videos to a Dope Mama YouTube channel (minimum 2 videos a month) in the first year. (I also plan to launch a separate channel for/about my kids.) Videos are the thing that makes me the most anxious but dammit, I want a piece of that pie!

Marijuana plant


I love opiates but I don’t want to be beholden to them. I have a lengthy blog post about this planned.  I’m trying to swap opiates for marijuana, which is why I probably come off like a teenager who just discovered pot and mentions it constantly. It’s a bit of a forced obsession.

I want to figure out why my body won’t drop a single fucking pound, no matter how few calories I eat.

I want more muscle and more stamina. (After three separate doctors running tests then shrugging and suggesting anti-depressants, I developed a case of the fuck-its regarding my post-baby body. Who knows, maybe now that I’m no longer breastfeeding – after doing it more than seven years straight! – things will shift.)

I want to do more yoga with my kids. I want to do handstands up against the wall.


I want to be out of debt, fix my credit, and to have enough income and savings to support me and my kids by myself if I had to.  I have a good idea of what needs to get done and how to do it, and I recently purchased a copy of On My Own Two Feet: A Modern Girl’s Guide to Personal Finance to help me get an even better understanding of the basics.

I want to entertain more often, and see friends and family more.

I want to establish a network of like-minded moms/parents and kids, ideally some type of homeschool/unschool group.

I want a little home office, whether it’s a full room or a corner. I want a home I’m excited to Instagram, and to create seasonal alters.

Sebastian has wanted a pug for a long time. Hopefully we can find a suitable mutt. (I’ve wanted a pet pig for ages but that probably isn’t realistic, especially in an apartment.)

More + Resources

I will likely go through this post and convert it into a hand-written to-do list.  Writing lists and narratives are both valuable tools.  If you like that sort of thing I recommend signing up for Gala Darling’s newsletter (click and scroll to bottom) and she’ll send you a free printable Radical Self Love WorksheetHer book is a worthwhile read too. I’ve followed her blog since back when it was called Icing.

Gabrielle Bernstein’s Ing contains writing and body exercises to make changes to yourself and your life.  I find her content in general to be hit or miss so take what works for you and leave the rest.  (Magical thinking and *manifesting* is overplayed and useless on its own but changing thought patterns is real and neurology-based.💫)

A Hip Guide to Happiness Gala Darling - Radical Self Love

I’ll be revisiting this post a year from now, next Thanksgiving. Hopefully my life will be a lot different and I’ll be thrilled, looking back, with how far I’ve come. While this is mainly for me, I hope that others may find the idea useful. I may tweak and edit this post now and then.

Happy Thanksgiving!🦃